“Your attempt may fail, but never fail to make an attempt’
This is a story with origins that would probably be difficult to trace back to the source. I’ve heard that it’s true—and I can imagine it is—but now it’s become something of a fable, or parable. Whatever the truth and whatever the source, I can tell you this: the story will make you think. The tale goes something like this…
A traveler was walking on a road, past a circus, when he noticed a pen of tethered elephants. He remarked that that these massive and beautiful creatures were restrained by a thin rope, tied to their left hind leg. A flimsy, poorly-constructed fence circled their corral, where beyond were beautiful fields and rolling hills. He saw a man tending their pen, and approaching him, said, “I can’t help but notice how thin the ropes are.”
“I’m sorry?” asked the man.
“The ropes,” he repeated, “they’re so thin and flimsy. Why don’t the elephants break them and run away? Don’t they ever try to escape their bonds?”
Pushing himself to his feet, the man visored his eyes and beheld his magnificent prisoners. “Sure,” he said. “They could break the ropes. But they never try because they don’t think they can. I’ve had these elephants since they were young calves. And when they were calves, these ropes were strong enough to hold them. At that age, they weren’t able to break them, and so, were conditioned to believe that they couldn’t.” The man shrugged. “I’ve always used the same ropes. The elephant’s believe the ropes can hold them so they never attempt to get away.”
The traveler was simultaneously amazed and horrified. At any time, these massive creatures could break their bonds and walk away. But since they didn’t believe they could, they never gave it a try.
This story has very special meaning to me. I wonder what it might mean to you. What invisible bonds are holding you back? What things have you tried, failed, and then given up on completely? And where did these limiting beliefs originate? Were they impressed upon us by society at large? By our communities? Our friends? Our own personal fears? What personal beliefs do you hold at the moment that are actually preventing you from moving forward? Worse than this, which of those beliefs are even yours? Could they be your spouse’s beliefs? Your friends’, parents’, coworker’s, or boss’s?
Over the past few weeks, I’ve examined my inner dialogue. I’ve tried to scrutinize and ponder certain beliefs when they first arise in my mind, and what I have found has truly shocked me. Some—if not most—of my core beliefs have actually been holding me back from true happiness. And that’s not to say that all of them are bad! These limiting beliefs are meant to protect me. Why would I allow myself to try something new if I perceive that thing to be somewhat risky? The ‘known outcome’ is comfortable to us—even if it isn’t what we want. We know it. We live it. We deal with it every day. Trying something new means putting ourselves out there. Taking a risk can be frightening. But apart from the fear, here’s one thing I know: it can be incredibly rewarding, too. And if we don’t try, we’ll never know what could have been, which to me, is worse than failing.
Ask yourself, “What’s the worst that can happen?” Failing? Having to resume life the way you’re living it now? I can’t imagine that happening, because every attempt—even if you perceive the end result to be a failure—tends to lead somewhere new and unimagined. Perhaps you desired a certain outcome and got something else instead. Is that bad? Maybe it is and maybe it isn’t, but it might be better than what you’re doing now.
I took a big risk this week. Over the past several months, I’ve been struggling to determine which path my professional life would take. I had many opportunities in front of me, but most of them didn’t feel right. That is…until one of them finally did. But to take that path, I had to evolve. I had to take professional classes, earn licenses, and embrace a potential outcome that isn’t known to me. I’m a planner—habitually so. Embracing the unknown isn’t something I’m good at.
Think about your own life this week. In what ways are you accepting false boundaries? In what ways are you tied down? Don’t make the conscious choice to stay where you are, only because you don’t think you can move. You can. You will. And yes, you may fail. But sometimes failure can lead to something you hadn’t envisioned before. Take a small step. Put one foot in front of the other. Follow a path that you set for yourself, because only at the end can you find true happiness. 